sarahcentric

I don’t know when I became an inspirational quote collector. But all of a sudden I’m the girl who reads a poem and gets all teary-eyed. And don’t worry, I definitely forward it to all of my friends with some square-ass note like “oh my god, so true!!!”. And worst of all, I print it out and tape it to my computer at work. Are you kidding me?! Feeling happy and touched is a serious risk to my street cred here in New York City…I could be killed! And hello, I work as a comedy writer with other comedy writers. How in the hell are my Jack Handey moments supposed to fit in at the office?! Whatever… it looks like inspirational quotes are sticking around for a while so everyone better get used to it.

Of course, I still think life is so irritating sometimes that I wonder who the hell invited it to my party. There’s not just the awful examples of human suffering like in China or Myanmar now, but the everyday challenges we all face that make us completely numb. I got a text from a friend recently who had one of these hopeless days. All it said was “Life is terrible. Over and out.” Of course she was fine an hour later and we cracked up. But as we all know, in the moment you’re moved to thumb that text out… curiously, not so funny.

But now I’m Miss Meditation who is “saying yes to everything” and I have to make room for both sides of the coin. I am no longer interested in making impossible demands from the world in order to fulfill a small story of the person I think I ought to be. That thinking falls under the umbrella of “placing your order with the universe” nonsense that I just don’t buy. Number 1) the universe has got bigger fish to fry then my career goals, perfect boyfriend and ideal weight. And 2) you don’t even get a tracking number!

I’m not looking to cram the whole world into my comfort zone by striving or complaining anymore. Instead, it’s all about reminding myself that I am actually a part of this world exactly as I am now. There are all kinds of fun rights that come along with that, and a certain amount of responsibility. The only thing I have to do is be myself, period. That is the only goal and the only resolution you’re all going to hear from me next New Year’s Eve.

Inspiration isn’t getting taped to my computer because it’s lovely and pretty. It makes it there because this new goal of mine feels a little disorienting and embarrassing sometimes, and a sister needs some support along the way. I’m working to build some sort of vision of the world here that’s hilarious and even fun at times, but also beneficial to someone who lives outside of my brain. But still, I am who I am. And I ain’t never going to Calcutta like Mother Teresa, because my hair would be a disaster in that humidity. No…if the world wants my help, it better have a pretty specific need for my unique skills and abilities; writing, baking, hanging out, laying around and eating.

And wouldn’t you know it! World called me in for my first interview when I was hungover on my couch eating ice cream on a Sunday night. I caught a 60 Minutes segment on childhood malnutrition in Africa and a new therapeutic food that could help end all of that…Plumpy’nut. (Before I go any further, I would like to commend you, World, on your excellent timing of a malnutrition story while I inhaled ice cream, and a product name like “Plumpy’nut” which is simply too catchy and funny for my brain to forget. Kudos.)

To be continued

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